Great advertisement clip from Thailand

FM: I know that this site is suppose to showcase funny materials from Malaysia, but sometimes, if I discover a poignant video, I just can't resist sharing it with you guys. Check out this video from Thailand. Really heart wrenching stuff.

Five arrested in connection with Nurin's murder

SHAH ALAM: Five people including a woman have been arrested in connection with the murder of eight-year-old Nurul Jazlin Jazimin here on Thursday.

A team of police officers from the Petaling Jaya and Selangor police at about 11.30pm picked up the five aged between 27 and 33 from several locations in Section 7 here.

It is learnt one of the five, a man in his 30s, has a string of criminal records including sexual assault cases here and in several other states.

CID director Commissioner Datuk Christopher Wan Soo Kee said the arrests were made possible following information from the public.

"Two cars and five cellular phones were seized from the suspects,'' he said, adding that they were detained to assist police in their investigation into the murder of Nurin Jazlin.

The arrest of the five is the first major breakthrough police have made since Nurin Jazlin was first reported missing from her Wangsa Maju flat on Aug 20.

Police have been working tirelessly to nab the killer/s and have reopened several old cases with similar modus operandi to narrow down their suspects.

Nurin Jazlin went missing on Aug 20 after she went to a night market by herself near her house in Section 1, Wangsa Maju, in Setapak.

Her body was found stuffed in a sports bag at a three-storey shop lot in Petaling Utama on Sept 17.

A post-mortem showed that she had been sexually assaulted.

Source: The Star Online

Update:

BREAKING NEWS: Four remanded in connection with Nurin's murder

Police obtained a seven-day remand order for the four male suspects to facilitate investigations. The four suspects, aged between 27 and 33, were picked up by members of a task force at various locations in Shah Alam to facilitate investigations into Nurin’s brutal death.

The fifth suspect, a pregnant woman, has been released after police recorded her statement.

The four men were earlier taken to the Kuala Lumpur Hospital where they underwent physical check-up before being taken to the Petaling Jaya Magistrate Court.

The Criminal Scene Investigation (CSI) team also went to a single-storey terrace house in Taman Kampung Kuantan in Klang, before proceeding to a double-storey shophouse in Section 7 in Shah Alam.

The Klang address belongs to the couple detained while the shophouse is where they run their textile business.

Source: The New Straits Times

Other Story:

FBI to assist in probe

THE United States’s Federal Bureau of Investigation have been called in to help police with the probe into the murder of eight-year-old Nurin Jazlin Jazimin.

Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Musa Hassan said an FBI agent is already in Kuala Lumpur while another will arrive soon.

It is learnt that the blurry images of a suspect caught on CCTV where the body was dumped will be sent to the FBI lab at the J. Edgar Hoover Building in 935 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, DC, to be enhanced.

“They are helping us with the investigation, especially on the technical side of the probe,” he said.POLICE have enlisted the help of the Federal Bureau of Investigation in the Nurin Jazlin Jazimin murder case.

It is learnt that the blurred images of a suspect caught on CCTV cameras where the body was dumped will be sent to the FBI lab at the J. Edgar Hoover Building in Washington, DC, to be enhanced.

An FBI agent is in Kuala Lumpur while another will arrive soon, said Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Musa Hassan yesterday.

“They are helping us with the investigation, especially on the technical side,” he said, adding that the images have been handed over to the agent, who is based at the US Embassy in Kuala Lumpur.

“The CCTV footage we have is blurry. We hope the FBI will be able to sharpen the images.” Once the image is enhanced, police will come up with a photofi t.

Musa said a local police offi cer will accompany the agents to the FBI laboratory.

“We recently contacted an FBI representative stationed here and they agreed to help,” he said.

He reiterated that police are working on several leads but declined to elaborate further.

Musa told reporters this after presenting Hari Raya goodies to police personnel at Federal police headquarters in Bukit Aman yesterday.

It was reported that police have retrieved images of two possible suspects from a CCTV camera close to where Nurin was found.

One of them is a motorcyclist with a sports bag while the other is a petite woman in a red top, who left the area with three men in a Perodua Kenari.

Nurin was reported missing after visiting a pasar malam near her house in Section 1, Wangsa Maju on Aug 20.

Her body was found stuffed in a sports bag that had been dumped in front of a book distribution company in PJS 1/48, Petaling Jaya Utama on Sept 17.

Post-mortem on her remains showed that she had been sexually assaulted with a brinjal and a cucumber.

She died from infection as the objects had ruptured her abdomen.

Nurin was buried at the Taman Ibukota Muslim cemetery last Friday.

A source said the Bernama journalist who reported that a suspect had been detained in connection with the case will give his statement at Sentul police station today.

It was reported yesterday that police had denied the report, calling it ‘irresponsible’.

Source: The Malay Mail

Related story: NEWS FLASH: DNA confirms body found in bag is Nurin

Funny Driving Test Question

FM: I heard JPJ is planning to incorporate this question in our Driving Test Question as a measure to reduce road accidents in Malaysia.

Nash ambil RM400,000

KUALA LUMPUR: Pengasas produk kecantikan Nouvelles Visages, Sosilawati Lawiya, 43, membuat laporan polis mendakwa suaminya, vokalis Lefthanded, Jamaludin Elias atau Nash, 47, mengeluarkan wang tunai miliknya berjumlah RM400,000 tanpa persetujuannya.

Ahli perniagaan terbabit yang mempunyai beberapa syarikat, termasuk pengedar kereta mewah import mendakwa dia terpaksa membuat laporan polis berikutan Nash dikatakan enggan memulangkan wang berkenaan selepas perbincangan dilakukan.

Laporan polis itu sebahagian rentetan krisis rumah tangga pasangan itu yang melangsungkan perkahwinan mereka dengan penuh gemilang kira-kira 10 bulan lalu.

Terbaru, Mahkamah Tinggi Syariah Shah Alam semalam membenarkan permohonan Sosilawati mendapatkan perintah interim secara ex-parte (sebelah pihak) untuk membekukan dan atau menghalang sebarang urusan pemindahan berkaitan hartanya yang bernilai hampir RM1 juta.

Sosilawati turut memfailkan permohonan cerai melalui peguamnya di Mahkamah Rendah Syariah, Gombak Timur pada 18 September lalu.

Menurut sumber polis, Sosilawati membuat laporan itu di Balai Polis Dang Wangi di sini, jam 11.45 pagi Isnin lalu, sejurus menyedari wang berkenaan sudah dikeluarkan.

Katanya, wanita terbabit sebelum itu menerima panggilan daripada Permodalan Nasional Berhad (PNB) di Jalan Tun Razak, di sini, pada jam 10 pagi yang memaklumkan wang simpanannya dalam Amanah Saham Bumiputera (ASB) dan Amanah Saham Wawasan (ASW) berjumlah RM400,000 dikeluarkan artis terbabit.

Sosilawati mendakwa dia membuat laporan polis selepas menemui bukti pengeluaran wang terbabit dilakukan Nash.

Di SHAH ALAM, Hakim Mahkamah Tinggi Syariah di sini, Saarani Ismail mengeluarkan perintah interim itu selepas meneliti semua alasan dalam afidavit permohonan yang difailkan Sosilawati pada 21 September lalu.

Beliau juga menetapkan perintah berkenaan berkuat kuasa semalam.

Sosilawati yang hadir jam 9 pagi ditemani anaknya, Erni Erinawati Sofia, 18, membuat permohonan itu melalui peguamnya, Datuk Mohd Zaidi Mohd Zin.

Prosiding itu bagaimanapun dibuat secara tertutup di dalam kamar hakim dengan dihadiri peguam dan Sosilawati.

Dalam afidavitnya, Sosilawati sebagai pemohon mendakwa dia mengeluarkan cek peribadi daripada akaun sendiri berjumlah RM400,000 untuk dilaburkan dalam dua skim amanah saham atas nama Nash antara Januari hingga Mac lalu.

Menurutnya, cek peribadi berkenaan dikeluarkan untuk tujuan pelaburan iaitu cagaran kepada bank untuk mendapatkan pinjaman bagi membuka syarikat usaha sama antara dia dan suaminya (responden).

“Bagaimanapun, kedua-dua akaun itu tidak dicagarkan kepada bank seperti dirancangkan dan kedua-dua sijil masih dalam pegangan suami.

“Sebaliknya, bagi memudahkan saya dan responden menubuhkan syarikat, pinjaman modal hanya dilakukan ke atas syarikat saya, Nouvelle Beauty Centre Sdn Bhd,” katanya.

Sosilawati memohon perintah interim terhadap suami, wakil dan ejennya daripada melakukan apa-apa urusan, penunaian, pemindahan, pertukaran gadaian atau apa-apa transaksi ke atas hartanya.

Ia termasuk sebarang penjualan, pemberian, pajakan, gadai atau atau melupuskan apa-apa kandungan atau bahagian daripada tiga harta iaitu sijil Amanah Saham Bumiputera (ASB) bernombor AQ 2198 dengan nombor akaun 09339050 bernilai RM200,000; sijil Amanah Saham Wawasan (ASW) bernombor DA2207 dengan nombor akaun 004583008 bernilai RM200,000 dan hartanah beralamat No 28, Jalan Turmalin Empat 7/12D, Seksyen 7, 40000, Shah Alam (bernilai RM480,000), ketiga-tiga atas nama Nash.

Pemohon juga meminta mahkamah memerintahkan CIMB Bank cawangan menara PNB, Kuala Lumpur, membekukan atau menghalang apa-apa urusan, termasuk penunaian atau sebarang transaksi ke atas apa-apa nilai atau jumlah bagi semua cek termasuk cek bank dan bank draf berkenaan, iaitu saham ASB dan ASW atas nama Nash sehingga perintah lain dikeluarkan mahkamah.

Permodalan Nasional Berhad (PNB) juga diminta memastikan perintah berkaitan sijil ASB dan ASW itu dipatuhi manakala Pejabat Tanah Daerah diminta melindungi hartanah di Seksyen 7, Shah Alam.

Dia mendakwa permohonan itu dibuat kerana mendakwa rumah tangganya dengan Nash menghadapi syiqaq berterusan dan responden meninggalkannya sejak sebulan lalu.

Menurutnya, dia amat bimbang harta itu dikeluarkan atau dipindah milik Nash tanpa pengetahuannya kerana semua harta itu didaftarkan atas nama suaminya.

Kata Sosilawati, dia bimbang Nash akan melakukan transaksi dan menyebabkannya mengalami kerugian.

Malah, katanya, dia sudah memfailkan permohonan cerai pada 18 September lalu di Mahkamah Rendah Syariah, Gombak Timur dan masih dalam proses sebutan.

Source: MyMetro

Britney Spears Number ONE fan

FM: You guys want to see Britney Spears Number 1# fan. His name is Chris Crocker and this video clip is totally hilarious! Basically, in this clip Chris Crocker is imploring Britney's critics to LEAVE HER ALONE,

Come on dude...she's really not that good!

New lead in Nurin’s case

IN a chilling development in the Nurin Jazlin Jazimin case, it is learnt that a man had approached another girl in August and asked her to follow him.

The girl refused.

On Aug 20, Nurin went missing.

Two days ago, a distraught mother lodged a report at the Wangsa Maju police station, claiming that her six-year-old daughter was approached by a man at a pasar malam in Setapak in August. He had invited her to feed cats at a mining pool.

City police Criminal Investigations Department chief Senior Assistant Commissioner II Ku Chin Wah said the modus operandi was similar to that of the Kampung Baru molester who had sexually assaulted two girls, aged fi ve and six.

He said police have a photofi t of the suspect, based on descriptions given by the six-year-old girl.

POLICE received another breakthrough in their investigations into the death of Nurin Jazilin Jazimin.

Two days ago, a distraught mother lodged a police report at Wangsa Maju station claiming that her six-yearold daughter was approached by a man in August who invited her to go feed cats at a mining pool somewhere.

The girl was at a pasar malam in Setapak when the man approached her.

She refused and walked away. The girl told her mother about it but she brushed it off. The woman was disturbed when she read about the gruesome discovery on Sept 17 and decided to lodge a report.

It is not known if the girl was alone or with someone else when the man approached her.

City police Criminal Investigations Department chief Senior Assistant Commissioner II Ku Chin Wah confi rmed the report, adding that the modus operandi was similar to that of the Kampung Baru molester who had sexually assaulted two girls, aged fi ve and six.

He said police have a photofi t of the suspect, drawn by artists based on descriptions given by the sixyear- old girl.

Ku said they are trying to establish a connection between the man, the Kampung Baru molester and the suspect involved in Nurin’s murder.

On June 29, it was reported that a girl who was waiting for her mother in front of the Kampung Baru Mosque after a religious class was taken away by a man on a black motorcycle. She was later found wandering the same day.

Investigations revealed that the man, clad in a black jacket and wearing a helmet, had sexually assaulted her with a brinjal before releasing her.

Three days later, another girl, aged six, was plucked from Jalan Raja Bot, in front of her father’s grocery shop and taken to an undisclosed location.

She was also sexually assaulted with a brinjal.

Nurin, an eight-year-old girl from Wangsa Maju was reported missing by her father, Jazimin Abdul Jalil, on Aug 20 after visiting a pasar malam near her house.

She was alone.

Despite the wide coverage and a massive search effort, she was not found.

On Sept 17, the naked body of a young girl, stuffed inside a sports bag which was dumped in Jalan PJS 1/48, was later identifi ed as Nurin.

She had been brutally assaulted and a post-mortem revealed that the assailant had sexually assaulted her with a brinjal and a cucumber.

The force was so great that it ruptured her stomach and an infection led to her death.

It was reported that Selangor police have blurry images of a suspect caught on a CCTV close to where the body was found.

The suspect was seen carrying a similar bag, placing it near the staircase.

Source: The Malay Mail

Business Logic

Father: I want you to marry a girl of my choice

Son: "I will choose my own bride!"

Father: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."

Son: "Well, in that case...ok"

Next Father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: "I have a husband for your daughter."

Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!"

Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."

Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."

President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"

Father: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."

President: "Ah, in that case...ok"

This is how business is done!!

Moral: Even If you have nothing, You can get Anything. But your attitude should be positive

Who will be the first Malaysian Astronaut?

FM: Ok everyone...if you're to choose between the two below to become Malaysia's first Astronaut, who will you pick?

The answer is obvious isn't it? We'll pick the GOOD LOOKING ONE! That's the Malaysian way..hah hah hah. If we have a SMS contest to select the candidate...the answer will still be the same.

It is official: Dr Sheikh Muszaphar is our astronaut

PETALING JAYA: Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi has named Dr Sheikh Muszaphar as the “primary candidate” and Kapt Dr Faiz Khaleed as the “secondary candidate” to go to space.

There has been a lot of speculation in the past few weeks with the foreign media naming Dr Sheikh Muszaphar as Malaysia’s first angkasawan (astronaut).

The Malaysian Angkasawan will join American astronaut Peggy Whitson and Russian cosmonaut Yuri Malenchenko in the flight to the International Space Station on board the Russian Soyuz TMA-11, which will blast off from Baikanur in Kazakhstan on Oct 10.

Source: The Star Online

Apabila wajah seiras selebriti

Persamaan karektor undang perhatian ramai, masalah

PUAS menjelaskan kedudukan sebenar serta memperkenalkan identiti diri sendiri tetapi jawapannya tetap sama. Orang ramai masih juga berkeras untuk mengambil gambar, mendapatkan tandatangan, selain bertanyakan perkembangan terkini.

Begitulah senario dilalui insan berwajahkan selebriti yang terpaksa menghadapi hampir setiap ketika disapa sebagai insan terkenal. Walhal, realitinya mereka bukanlah seperti yang disangka-sangka peminat fanatik sesetengah artis terkenal.

Jika dilihat daripada aspek berbeza, mungkin ada untungnya memiliki paras rupa umpama bintang terkenal. Layanan yang diterima, sanjungan serta perhatian sudah cukup memberikan keselesaan. Namun, bagaimana pula jika setiap masa diri diganggu dengan kegilaan peminat fanatik sehingga merimaskan dan mengurangkan privasi diri akibat populariti insan lain.

Itu belum lagi mengambil kira soal gosip serta perilaku artis sebenar yang turut `terpalit’ di wajah mereka semata-mata memiliki paras rupa sama.

i-Kon minggu ini menjejaki insan `bertuah’ yang saling tidak tumpah memiliki rupa paras seperti bintang terkenal. Shaifulruddin Mohd Idzaham Shah, Rafidah Ibrahim dan Ahmad Munir Mohamad umpamanya yang sudah `jelik’ disapa seperti Mawi, Datuk Siti Nurhaliza dan Fahrin Ahmad!

Bukan sekali dua, malah hampir saban hari mengalami peristiwa disapa sehingga ada yang begitu teruja melihat insan ini menaiki tren LRT, menikmati makanan di gerai dan menetap di kawasan perumahan kos sederhana sedangkan realitinya mereka bukanlah selebriti yang ternyata mencipta kemasyhuran dalam industri hiburan tempatan.

Sehinggakan, mereka sendiri sudah tidak mampu untuk menidakkan permintaan peminat selebriti terkenal walaupun secara nyata ketiga-tiga mereka bukanlah selebriti sebenar sebagaimana yang diragui orang ramai. Saya yang berpeluang mendekati `artis terkenal’ ini jelas bingung kerana mereka sebenarnya turut mempunyai pesona tersendiri seakan-akan artis.

Bukan saja cara pembawaan, percakapan, senyuman dan personaliti mereka bertiga juga saling tidak tumpah seperti Mawi, Siti Nurhaliza dan Fahrin!

“Kata orang manusia memang mempunyai tujuh wajah serupa. Mungkin Mawi sudah bertemu dengan seorang daripada tujuh insan lain yang serupa dengannya. Seronok juga bila dapat melihat orang yang serupa dengan kita,” akui Shaifulruddin atau turut disapa sebagai klon Mawi bagi yang mengenali identiti sebenarnya.

Bercerita mengenai tempias insan ternama ini, sebenarnya di sekeliling hidup saya sendiri pernah terserempak dengan ramai insan berwajah serupa. Ada lucu dan simpatinya bila melihat mereka turut disangka selebriti terkenal sedangkan yang betul adalah sebaliknya.

Umpamanya, kenalan saya, bekas wartawan di New Straits Times (NST), Hafidah Samat yang kini penyampai televisyen di Awani Astro yang sering kali disangkakan penyanyi terkenal Jaclyn Victor. Ingat lagi ketika di awal kemunculan Jac di Malaysian Idol, ramai kenalan mengusik Hafidah dengan nama Jac.

Selain Hafidah, Pengurus Perhubungan Awam Hilton Kuala Lumpur, Zalia Shamsul pula sibuk dikatakan mempunyai iras aktres terkenal Hollywood, Catherine Zeta Jones! Bekas model ini sendiri menafikan dirinya seperti bintang Hollywood terkenal itu.

Ketika ingin membuat artikel ini pun, seorang kenalan yang berkerja di sebuah penerbitan akhbar segera mengajak ke pejabatnya semata-mata untuk menyaksikan wajah pegawai keselamatannya yang persis legenda badminton negara, Rashid Sidek. Sungguh...memang serupa!

Ikuti, paparan serta pengalaman insan bertuah kerana memiliki rupa paras bintang pujaan!

Naomi Campbell ada dua

SUDAHLAH masyhur, ternama dan menjadi buruan pereka fesyen terkenal dunia pula. Bagaimanapun, bukan mudah sebenarnya menjadi supermodel seperti Naomi Campbell. Model berkulit gelap ini menjadi perhatian peminatnya sehingga ada yang sanggup meniru penampilan serta wajahnya.

Bayangkan, peminatnya berani tampil sebagai Naomi ketika majlis penganugerahan Brit Awards. Kejadian ini membuatkan Naomi geram dan cemas.

Dia meminta penganjur berhati-hati terhadap wanita yang meniru perwatakannya.

Naomi mengetahui perkara itu selepas kemunculan wanita terbabit pada malam Anugerah Brit Awards yang dianjurkan kumpulan muzik Inggeris, Oasis, Rabu lalu.

Naomi berkata, sesiapa yang memalsukan identitinya bertuah kerana boleh masuk ke majlis itu secara percuma.

"Siapa dia sebenarnya? Saya tidak percaya dia sanggup menyamar sebagai saya dan berjalan pada majlis anugerah itu juga sebagai saya.

"Sebenarnya saya tiada di London pada Rabu lalu. Waktu itu saya di Paris untuk sesi penggambaran," katanya.

Muskil gara-gara Fahrin

PARAS rupanya memang saling tidak tumpah seperti pelakon dan model popular, Fahrin Ahmad. Ketinggian, bentuk muka, berat hinggalah caranya tersenyum. Berkali-kali pun bila diperhatikan, memang kelibat aktor itulah seakan berada di samping anda.

Begitulah senario yang membelenggu penasihat undang-undang di sebuah bank terkemuka di ibu negara, Ahmad Munir Mohamad, 30, yang sering dikaitkan dengan Fahrin. Ke mana saja, bila-bila masa, perkara itulah yang dibangkitkan orang di sekelilingnya sehingga membataskan pergerakannya.

“Ramai kenalan dan saudara mara mula menyedari wajah saya saling tidak tumpah seperti Fahrin sejak iklannya bersama Maggie Sup disiarkan di kaca televisyen.

“Naik panik dibuatnya bila ramai menegur kerana ingatkan saya yang berlakon iklan itu,” kata Ahmad Munir yang berasal dari Kota Bharu, Kelantan.

Kekeliruan orang ramai semakin bertambah apabila Fahrin semakin popular dan mula menyinar dalam bidang lakonan menyebabkan dia secara tidak langsung terkena tempias populariti jejaka itu.

Boleh dikatakan saban hari, ada saja orang yang menegur Ahmad Munir kerana menyangkakan yang beliau adalah pelakon popular itu.

“Kejadian terbaru yang saya alami dalam tren LRT. Tiga remaja perempuan menyapa dengan mengatakan yang terlihat lakonan saya, Kasih Suci di TV3.

“Bayangkan ketika itu di tengah-tengah ramai penumpang, saya menjadi cukup malu untuk menghadapi semua itu sedangkan saya bukanlah Fahrin yang sebenar,” katanya.

“Situasi sama turut berlaku di tempat kerja. Sampai naik segan nak ke cafe kerana banyak mata yang memandang merasakan yang saya ini Fahrin. Malah, kenalan di tempat kerja juga menggelar saya tauke nasi ayam,” gelaknya bila mana namanya turut dikaitkan dengan penyampai dan pengacara, Linda Onn.

Lebih menguatkan lagi persamaan dua jejaka ini ialah masing-masing juga berusia 30 tahun dan memiliki ijazah dalam bidang yang sama - undang-undang!

Mungkin semua itu berlaku secara kebetulan, tetapi kedaan itu juga menyebabkan Ahmad Munir `meragui’ statusnya dalam keluarga.

Tiada adik-beradik lain yang berwajah seperti Fahrin, jauh sekali mereka sekeluarga mempunyai ikatan persaudaraan dengan Fahrin.

“Saya sampai bertanya pada ibu status saya dan ibu memberitahu saya adalah anak kandungnya,” katanya.

Rezeki murah seiras Mawi

KELIBATNYA ketika menghadiri sesi uji bakat Akademi Fantasia musim kelima menimbulkan banyak persoalan. Ramai jugalah yang garu kepala melihatnya ketika berbaris panjang bersama calon lain. Pada fikiran orang ramai, bukankah Mawi sudah menggondol gelaran juara bagi musim ketiga, dua tahun lalu, mengapa menghadiri uji bakat lagi?

Itulah perkara yang membelenggu diri Shaifulruddin Mohd Idzaham Shah, 21, ketika menghadiri sesi uji bakat siri nyanyian realiti popular berkenaan, suatu ketika dulu. Walaupun tidak berjaya disenarai pendek, `tuah’ wajah seiras dengan penyanyi popular, Mawi membuatkan dirinya menarik perhatian ramai.

Bayangkan, pada sesi uji bakat itu, dia terpaksa `dikurungkan’ kerana ramai yang beranggapan anak muda kelahiran Kuala Lumpur ini adalah Mawi. Malah, hasrat untuk mencuba nasib bergelar peserta Akademi Fantasia bertukar cerita.

Sejak awal pagi hingga membawa ke petang dia terpaksa melayani temu ramah bersama media yang cukup teruja dengan penampilan dan gayanya yang saling tidak tumpah seperti penghibur muda terkenal itu.

“Beginilah saya sehari-hari. Sudah nasib kerana memiliki persamaan dengan Mawi. Namun, saya tidak merasakan ia sebagai suatu tekanan kerana percaya dengan kuasa-Nya sebagai pencipta.

“Malah, kerana berwajah seiras ini, saya menjadi rapat juga dengan Mawi dan berpeluang mengenalinya secara lebih dekat,” katanya yang menyifatkan Mawi sebagai seorang yang cukup terbuka dan kelakar.

Sering disapa orang sebagai Mawi, Shaifulruddin sudah tidak mampu untuk menjelaskan keadaan sebenar kerana ramai yang tidak mahu menerima penjelasannya hingga adakalanya dia hanya mengangguk dan tersenyum melayan sapaan orang seolah-olah dia adalah Mawi.

“Sebelum saya sampai ke sini (pejabatnya) tadi pun, sudah ramai yang menyapa ketika menuruni tangga di flet tempat saya tinggal. Sukar untuk menjelaskan dengan masyarakat yang masih tidak faham dengan identiti saya sebagai Shaifulruddin.

Tetapi dalam ramai itu ada jugalah yang tahu saya sebagai klon Mawi kerana terlihat paparan media sebelum ini,” katanya.

Dalam asyik bersembang dengannya, sempat jugalah menjeling tingkah lakunya, senyumnya, cara dia bertutur, tergelak dan langkahnya yang memang serupa dengan Mawi. Saiz badan dan ketinggian juga tidak banyak berbeza. Tiada cacat celanya lebih-lebih lagi bila dia mengenakan kaca mata hitam dan bertopi!

Tambah pula kepalanya yang botak dan wajah berjambang seperti Mawi. Sengaja meniru penampilan Mawi?

“Jika tidak membotakkan kepala ini pun sudah puas saya menghadapi peminat fanatik Mawi yang beriya-iya mengatakan saya Mawi yang sebenar,” katanya yang sebelum ini berambut panjang.

Ditanya adakah dia turut terkena tempias aura populariti Mawi, Shaifulruddin berkata, pesona Mawi cukup dirasakannya tidak saja melalui peminat fanatiknya tetapi dia sendiri turut diundang menyanyi untuk majlis makan malam.

Kebetulan, beliau sendiri boleh menyanyi dengan baik dan lagu penyanyi pujaan ramai itu jugalah yang didendangkan ketika mengadakan persembahan.

“Adalah rezeki untuk membuat persembahan dalam seminggu itu. Mungkin kerana aura Mawi, rezeki turut berpihak kepada saya,” katanya.

Rafidah klon Siti Nurhaliza

KEMENANGANNYA menerusi rancangan realiti, Siti Nurhaliza Mencari Bintang Pantene, awal tahun ini bagaikan sudah diduga. Berbeza dengan peserta lain, karisma dan personaliti menarik gadis kecil molek berusia 21 tahun ini jelas terserlah sejak awal lagi.

Tetapi bukan itu saja yang membuatkan kemunculan Rafidah dinanti-nantikan dan menjadi perhatian ramai. Ada satu lagi keistimewaan gadis ini. Wajahnya persis Datuk Siti Nurhaliza!

Perhatikan raut wajahnya - mata, hidung, tulang pipi, bibir serta keningnya - saling tidak tumpah seperti wajah Siti Nurhaliza.

Lebih mengujakan tatkala berbual dengan Rafidah, suaranya juga persis penyanyi tersohor itu. Benar sekali, suara lemak merdu yang sedikit garau sebagaimana milik penyanyi itu turut dimiliki Rafidah. Gelak ketawanya usahlah dipersoal lagi - memang serupa!

“Ada pro dan kontranya bila memiliki iras seperti Siti Nurhaliza. Cuma saya meletakkannya dalam aspek positif menerusi keperibadiannya dan kejayaan beliau menerusi bidang seni ini.

“Peluang bertemu dengannya memang saat dinantikan kerana personalitinya memang cukup menarik serta tutur katanya cukup menyenangkan,” kata Rafidah yang memenangi wang tunai RM10,000, loket bentuk Pantene dan kontrak iklan bersama syampu terkenal itu selama setahun.

Ditanya adakah Siti Nurhaliza turut ada merasai persamaan, Rafidah berkata, antara dia dan penyanyi terkenal itu tidak pula membicarakan soal itu walaupun sering bertemu sepanjang program berkenaan, tetapi dia pernah dikhabarkan oleh penata gaya, Peter Lum yang Siti Nurhaliza ada membangkitkan hal berkenaan.

“Peter ada bertanyakan Siti Nurhaliza adakah Rafidah itu adiknya tetapi penyanyi terkenal itu menggeleng tetapi tergelak kerana merasakan memang ada persamaan antara kami.

“Peter kata, Siti Nurhaliza ada mengatakan yang dia seolah-olah melihat wajahnya sendiri di cermin bila berdepan dengan saya,” katanya yang hanya dimaklumkan mengenai peristiwa itu pada akhir rancangan realiti berkenaan.

Source: Berita Harian

Pre-takeoff Announcement on a China Southern Airlines Flight

This is a true account of what was heard on a recent flight from Shenzhen to Qingtao by China Southern Airlines:

"Good afternoon, Ladies and the German. This is your cheap purser Wang Lui speaking. On behalf of China Sudden Airlines, I would like to welcome you on board our Bowling 737 from Shenzhen to Qingtao. Members of my crew speak Chinese and other languages that you do not know. It is a great pressure serving you to-die. Should you need any resistance during the fright, peace do pest the call button. I and my gals are available to make you feel comfortable. Meanwhile, the airkwaft is going to fry. Peace sit upright and keep you belt tightly fastened until dinner is served at five dirty p.m. Hope you would enjoy your fright with us. Funk kill."

Marie Digby - Youtube Phenomenon

Marie Digby became famous through her acoustic version of Rihanna song "Umbrella" which she filmed and released in Youtube. Check out her awesome acoustic version of "Umbrella"

Bar Council to take action against lawyer in video recording

KUALA LUMPUR: The Bar Council is moving to take disciplinary action against the lawyer caught on video in 2002 for allegedly seeking to influence judicial appointments.

Sources said the lawyer's alleged misconduct was the only agenda set for an emergency council meeting called for tomorrow, following the video recording's release on Thursday.

"The video tape issue and the action to be taken against the lawyer will be discussed at the meeting," a source said.

The Bar Council, as the complainant, would refer the matter to the Disciplinary Board set up under the Legal Profession Act 1976.

The council would first issue a show-cause letter to the respondent for an explanation, which, if unsatisfactory, would then be referred to the board.
The board will set up a disciplinary committee to hear the case, which will then forward its recommendations.

Those found guilty of misconduct under Section 103 of the Act could be fined, suspended or struck off the rolls.

The respondent can appeal to the High Court against the board's decision.

Kuala Lumpur Bar Committee chairman R. Ravindra Kumar called for "an immediate and thorough investigation by the police and Anti-Corruption Agency (ACA) of the protagonist on the video and all the persons named, as well as all matters raised that are warranted".

Meanwhile, Parti Keadilan Rakyat (PKR) handed over evidence, including the video clip, to Federal Territory ACA director Abu Zubir Mohd Hassan at the latter's office yesterday.

PKR vice-president Sivarasa Rasiah said in a statement that he had handed over an eight-minute copy of a video clip, a one-minute audio recording and a copy of a press statement dated Sept 19 issued by the party on Thursday.

Source: The New Straits Times


Comments from the Deputy Prime Minister:

Establish if lawyer brokering video is authentic first: Najib

SUBANG: The Government will have to first establish the authenticity of the video footage of a senior lawyer brokering the appointment of judges, before deciding on any action, said the Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak.

Najib said he personally had not seen the footage.

However, he stressed that it was important to establish the veracity of the footage "before jumping to any conclusion."

"Modern day technology can also be abused and fabricated. So before we conclude anything let us establish whether there is basis or not," Najib told reporters after launching the Malaysia Airlines Engineering Training Center here on Friday.

Asked if an investigation on the matter would be carried out, he said: "We have to establish it first. Then whatever it is, we will decide at the next stage."

To a question, Najib said he had "not formally" spoken to Chief Justice Tun Ahmad Fairuz Sheikh Abdul Halim about the matter.

Probed further on whether he had engaged in communication with the Chief Justice, Najib said: "I think you better ask the Chief Justice, in this regard."

On Wednesday, Parti Keadilan Rakyat released a videoclip, purportedly shot in 2002, which it obtained recently of the lawyer talking on the telephone to someone who seemed to be a senior judge about how he (the lawyer) had helped get this judge appointed to one of the top judiciary posts.

According to the telephone conversation, the appointment was done through a prominent businessman and a politician.

The lawyer was heard saying that he was working through the two persons to get the judge elevated even further and get him a “Tan Sri” title. The names of a number of prominent judges were also mentioned in the video.

Source: The Star Online

Related Story: Lingam tape - Anwar’s explosive video clip on Judiciary Compromised by Lim Kit Siang

Why Americans do not know where USA is located in the world map?

A great insight from an American beauty pageant on why Americans can't locate their own country in the world map...truly hilarious anwer.

Question: Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can't locate U.S. in a world map, why do you think this is?

Answer:

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Lingam tape - Anwar’s explosive video clip on Judiciary Compromised by Lim Kit Siang

An interesting article from Lim Kit Siang, a Malaysian opposition leader (DAP). He wrote:

"Anwar Ibrahim has produced an explosive video clip on Judiciary Compromised which has set off reverberations in the Palace of Justice, the corridors of power, offices and homes in the country as well as internationally.

The time for reckoning for the restoration of a truly independent judiciary and a just rule of law cannot be put off any longer.

Malaysiakini has carried the transcript of the conversation between lawyer V.K. Lingam with Chief Justice Ahmad Fairuz sometime in 2002, as recorded in the videoclip, viz:

“The CJ said he is relative to now Agong, so he wants to stay on to 68, so, Tengku Adnan, I told Tengku Adnan, yesterday I had a meeting with him.

He said PM is already very angry with him, he said no problem he is going to make you acting err.. confirm your position as PCA, working very hard then working very hard to get Tan Sri Mokhtar as CJM.

Ah, we just keep it confidential. I am working very hard on it. Then there is a letter, according to Tengku, I am going to see him tomorrow, there is a letter sent to CJ, I mean Tan Sri Dzaiddin, that Datuk Heliliah, Datuk Ramli, Datuk Ramli and Datuk Ma’roop be made judges, and he rejected Dr Andrew Chui and apa itu Zainuddin Ismail lah. Because Zainuddin Ismail condemned your appointment and Tan Sri Mokhtar’s appointment.

And then you also, you seems to wrote a letter for the remaining five be confirmed as judges. As per our memo I discuss with Tun Eusoff Chin and we sent the same memo to PM.

I just want to get a copy letter that that has been done.

And then Tan Sri Dzaiddin said he is going to recommend six people for the court of appeal, but until today the letter hasn’t come to PM. He never discuss, but neither he has sent the letter to PM. Yes he has not sent. I know it is under the constitution for judges all that is your job Datuk to send, but we don’t want to make it an issue now.

Ah. Ok Actually I told Tengku Adnan to inform PM, PM to call you for a meeting. I organize it so that Tengku Adnan will call you directly. And then I got your number, I will tell him to call you directly to for you to meet PM lah. So should be ok, then ar.. correct correct, it is very important that the key players must be there.

Correct x3. correct x2. You know that the same problem that Tun Eusoff Chin has. He tried to do all this and yet he has run out of soldiers. He couldn’t do it because many are from the other camp. Last time was unfortunate because Tun Daim was doing everything sabotaging, otherwise how are things with you - everything is ok?. No, don’t worry.

You know sometimes Tan Sri Vincent that half the time they are talking about judiciary rather than doing the work. But if I don’t do this part my work will be useless.

Ha ha ha. Ah yes.Correct x5, right x3 correct. Ah right susah. You see he has now up for six court of appeal judges, so that he can put his men before he retires.

Correct x3, ah and then ah, correct. But never-mind, I will do this, I will get Tengku Adnan to arrange for PM to call you and Tan Sri Vincent Tan for PM to call you. And you know why, actually, I am very grateful with Tan Sri Vincent Tan you know why, I brainwash you so much even I quarrel with him.

One day I went to Vincent Tan house, I fire him at the night in his house. I said bloody hell if you don’t do this who will do it?

All these people Tun Eusoff Chin, Datuk Ahmad Fairuz, Tan Sri Zainon all fought for that. Then he called Tengku Adnan. Tengku Adnan he said, saya bukan Perdana Menteri Malaysia lah, you know. If the old man doesn’t want to listen to me, go to hell.

He quarreled with me. I said never mind, never mind, you talk to PM again tomorrow morning to put Datuk Ahmad Fairuz to CJM. So next day morning he went and he called me back 9.30 that he said PM has already agreed.

So I said never mind, we hope for the best. So I said no harm trying, the worst that it can happen is that you lose. Being the old man, he is 76 years old, he gets whispers everywhere, and then you don’t whisper, he get taken away by the other side. But, now PM is very alert because every time he gets letters from Tan Sri Dzaiddin, he called Tengku Adnan, he said discuss with Vincent, come and discuss.

Yes yes, ya. Correct x2, ya, but you see although I know PM, I am a lawyer in practice my views are.. I go through them, I go through them lah. Ah x4.

And then Dzaiddin will call them telling that you went saw PM and you make a big issue out of it. Oh ya, I think so, I think so.

Ok, fine x4 ok x4

Ah x2 correct x2. Now I heard Raja Aziz, Raja Aziz two weeks ago spoke to my lawyer Thayalan, and another lawyer Ailan, in the high court, they have a case each other. So, Thayalan and Ailan asked Raja Aziz, how is Tan Sri Wan Adnan?

He said he is on his way down. But you know what is the shocking thing he said? Datuk Fairuz became CJM. He overruled everybody, in three months time, he is going be made PCA, and 6 months time he is going to be CJ. He said he can’t think, he’s shocked. He told us.

Ha, it seems that they are going to organize a campaign to run you down. But you just keep quite, don’t say anything. Even the press asked, you said I leave it to God, that’s all. Don’t say. I really like your message. You said you work very hard, what can I do? I leave it to God.

That’s the best answer Datuk that you can ever be.

Ah… I will also get Tan Sri to remind PM to put a Tan Sri-ship this year lah. This will elevate you, you know.

Oh yes x4. ha. Steve Shim got so fast, Tan Sri Chong waited for whole year to get Tan Sri-ship.

Ah.. My god that’s why, ah. Correct x4, ya x4 right x3 correct x2

Don’t worry, we organize this. If Tan Sri Vincent and Tengku Adnan want to meet you privately, they will, I will call you. We organize in a private arrangement, in a very neutral place.

No don’t worry, Datuk, I know how much you suffer for Tun Eusoff Chin. And Tun said Datuk Ahmad Fairuz 110% loyalty. We want to make sure our friends are there for the sake of the PM and the sake of the country.

Not for our own interest, not for our own interest. We want to make sure the country come first. Well, you suffered so well, so much you have done. For the election, Wee Choo Keong, everything. How much, no body would have done all these.

Yes, you know. Good lah. Don’t worry. I am constantly working on this.

Ya ya, don’t worry x2. We work hard on this. And Datuk, and then if Tan Sri Vincent and Tengku Adnan want to see you, I will organize it in such a confidential place.

Ok Datuk very best. God bless you and your family.

Ok. Thank you thank you. Bye.”

An immediate response from Tun Fairuz is called for. Is he going to confirm or deny the phone conversation?" Read further...

FM: Then again this whole 'Lingam Tape' could be just a misunderstanding. Maybe Mr. V.K. Lingam is merely play acting and that there is nobody on the other side of the phone. Maybe, this could merely be a phone conversation that he intends to make - a 'practise conversation'. :) Maybe when V.K. Lingam actually made the call, the person he intended to talk to was not in.
Hey! it is possible!!

What is Marketing?

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I am very rich. Marry me!"
That's Direct Marketing

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's very rich. Marry him."
That's Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and get her telephone number.
The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me."
That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink.
You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say, "By the way, I'm very rich "Will you marry me?"
That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
She walks up to you and says, "You are very rich, I want to marry you."
That's Brand Recognition.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I'm rich. Marry me"
She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
That's Customer Feedback

TELUK BAHANG Fisherman Found This, Newspaper Not Allowed To Publish!

TELUK BAHANG Fisherman Found This, Newspaper Not Allowed To Publish!

Death after easing himself

GEORGE TOWN: A 72-year-old shipping company employee slipped and fell into the sea while answering nature’s call on board a tugboat yesterday.

Bashah Hassan of Sungai Pinang was with his colleague, Mazuki Abu Bakar, 58, when the incident happened shortly after midnight.

Bashah struggled and shouted frantically for help after falling into the sea but Mazuki could do nothing to save him due to the choppy waves and strong currents.

Relating the incident, Mazuki said Bashah had told him earlier that he wanted to ease himself.

"Shortly, I heard Bashah’s loud screams for help. I had a shock when I saw him struggling to keep himself afloat in the rough seas."
Mazuki threw a rope for Bashah but the victim failed to grab it.

A search-and-rescue mission was jointly conducted by the Marine Police, Fire and Rescue Department and Civil Defence Department.

Bashah’s body has yet to be recovered.

Source: The New Straits Times

Dear Ah Beng: Got this creepy guy want to give me $100,000

Dear Ah Beng,

Got this creepy guy hor, come and approach me when I was sitting at Burger King and say he would give me $100,000 if I go and kill his wife leh. I think it's not a very nice thing to do, but then, I donno his wife, and the money is si beh solid. How? Should I do it?

Teenager

Dear Teenager,

I never understand why people want to kill their wife. Si beh leceh one. If you not happy with your marriage is very simpur one. Just go Chow Kit and find some GRO in a KTV lounge, and everything is gau timm. But I agree, $100,000 is a lot of money.

I have a better suggestion. Why don't you go and tell his wife about it, then ask how much she wants for you to kill him? After all he sounds like an asshole. If he finds out, then up the price. And say if he doesn't pay, you'll tell the police. Simpur-simpur, and you don't have to kill anybody.

Ah Beng

The Tonight Show: Jay Leno's post-jail interview with Paris

Funny...enough said!

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Penganjur buruk siku

Cuba ‘rampas’ kereta pemenang pertandingan memancing

ALOR STAR: “Saya tiada pilihan kecuali terpaksa merantai kereta Proton Gen.2 yang saya menangi dengan rantai besi kerana penganjur mahu mengambilnya semula,” kata Che Mat Mustaffa, juara pertandingan memancing sempena Hari Kebangsaan ketika ditemui di sini, semalam.

Che Mat, 64, seorang pesara kerajaan dari Taman Indah, Pokok Sena di sini, terpaksa merantai roda belakang kereta yang dimenanginya itu pada tiang besi rumahnya sebagai langkah berjaga-jaga selepas mendapat tahu kenderaan itu mungkin diambil semula pihak penganjur pertandingan berkenaan.

Dia memenangi hadiah utama itu selepas menaikkan seekor patin seberat 8.21 kilogram dalam pertandingan memancing di Tasik Darulaman, Jitra, dekat sini, 31 Ogos lalu.

Menurutnya, tindakan itu terpaksa dilakukan bagi mengelak dia berputih mata berikutan pihak penganjur memaklumkan hasrat mengambil semula kereta itu daripadanya.

“Bukan mudah menuntut hadiah ini. Walaupun diisytiharkan pemenang pertama, penganjur memberi pelbagai alasan, malah hampir tercetus pergaduhan berpunca sikap tidak jujur mereka,” katanya.

Che Mat mendakwa dia terpaksa bertemu penganjur beberapa kali bagi menuntut hadiah, namun mereka memberi pelbagai alasan tidak logik bagi mengelak menyerahkan kereta itu.

Katanya, selepas mengadakan pertemuan dengan penganjur beberapa hari lalu, akhirnya mereka bersetuju menyerahkan kereta itu dengan memberi sepucuk surat.

“Kereta itu kini milik saya walaupun masih belum mempunyai cukai jalan dan insurans, tapi saya kecewa kerana mereka enggan membantu mendaftarkan kereta ini walaupun saya menyediakan wang untuk tujuan itu,” katanya.

Dia juga tidak faham dengan sikap penganjur yang mendakwa beberapa masalah perlu diselesaikan terlebih dulu sebelum kereta berkenaan dibawa pulang.

“Saya keliru kerana tak tahu apa status kereta itu sekarang,” katanya.

Che Mat berkata, dia sudah membuat laporan di Ibu Pejabat Polis Daerah Kubang Pasu di sini, kelmarin mengenai masalah itu.

Pemenang kedua, Junaidi Mahmud, 37, pula sepatutnya menerima hadiah sebuah motosikal Gillera bernilai RM15,000 tetapi pihak penganjur hanya memberikannya motosikal Naza GTR 150S berharga RM7,000.

“Sepatutnya, pihak penganjur menyediakan dulu motosikal ketika pertandingan itu dan mereka tidak sepatutnya berdolak-dalik.

“Penganjur memberi alasan motosikal itu sudah ditempah, tapi belum sampai, tapi ini mungkin taktik untuk mengaburi 1,000 pemancing yang menyertai pertandingan,” katanya.

Junaidi yang bekerja di sebuah klinik kerajaan di Kepala Batas, dekat sini, turut menggesa pihak penganjur menyerahkan wang lebihan hadiah kemenangannya.

Katanya, dia hanya menerima hadiah bernilai RM7,000 iaitu harga motosikal yang diterimanya manakala wang selebihnya RM8,000 belum diserahkan.

“Ini disebabkan pihak penganjur gagal menyerahkan motosikal berharga RM15,000 seperti diuar-uarkan dalam pertandingan itu,” katanya yang membuat aduan di ibu pejabat polis daerah sama kelmarin.

Usaha Harian Metro menghubungi penganjur gagal apabila beberapa panggilan telefon tidak dijawab.

Sementara itu, Ketua Polis Daerah Kubang Pasu, Superintendan Karim Abu, mengesahkan menerima kedua-dua aduan itu.

“Kami akan membuat siasatan mengenai perkara ini. Jika ada lagi pemancing yang berasa tertipu oleh penganjur sama, mereka boleh membuat laporan dengan segera,” katanya.

Source: myMetro

Penang seaside spots cleared for fear of tsunami

FM: While the rest of Sumatran scrambling to hilltops, our fellow Malaysian in Penang decided to have a look at the Tsunami.

PENANG: Most Penangites were not aware of the tsunami alert and many were still enjoying the cool sea breeze at the Esplanade and Gur-ney Drive last night.

A check by The Star found that most had not heard about the 8.2 magnitude earthquake off Sumatra until police officers in patrol cars arri-ved, and and instructed them to stay away from the beaches.

Driver Ismail Abu Bakar, 40, had just parked his motorcycle at the Esplande when he heard about the alert from the police.

“I did not know about the earthquake. Now I am a little worried and I think it is best to leave,” he said.

Three Universiti Sains Malaysia (USM) students, who were fishing at Esplanade, also packed up their equipment and left.

One of the students, who wanted to be known only as David, said that he and his two friends had heard about the Indonesian earthquake on the car radio but they went on with their plans as they were already there.

“We are not really worried about it. We have been advised to watch the water and if it suddenly subsides, we should make a run,” the 23-year-old said.

Many like them complied with the police’s instructions. However, some did not heed the alert.

Earlier, some residents at Sri Tanjong, Jalan Perak, felt tremors in their apartments.

A resident, Tan Lay Hoon, 49, staying on the eighth floor, said that she noticed her chair shaking while she was reading the newspaper.

“It was about 7.20pm when I felt the tre-mors. They lasted about four minutes. I was shocked so I went over to my neighbour’s and asked her if she had felt anything. She thought she was dizzy due to her high blood pressure.

“I later called up a friend who lives at Lebuh Macallum. She also felt the tremors. We later found out from the news that there was an earthquake in Indonesia,” she said.

However, Tan was not afraid when she felt the tremors and did not leave her apartment, saying that she had encountered stronger tre-mors before during previous incidents.

According to the state Meteorological De-partment, the tsunami alert was called off at 11pm.

Source: The Star Online

Morons at Airport - very funny

FM: Received this from a friend. Totally Hilarious!

Two guys have wasted their time at airports, in this case, London’s Heathrow, by writing down strange names and asking the airport Information Center to locate these people by calling out their names on the airport’s PA system. These guys would then hang out beneath the speakers and record the results.

In order to make it as believable as possible, they dressed up as chauffeurs and asked for help finding these people about 40 minutes after a Thai Airways, Malaysian Airlines or Air India flight had landed.

They acted as if they could not pronounce the names themselves, so as not to reveal the joke, but just handed over a note with the names printed on it and asked the employee at the Information Center.

After the fifth recording, they had to leave Heathrow as airport security figured out what was going on. The last recording is from Gatwick.

To hear the recordings, click on the videos below. Give these guys the Big Practical Joker prize.

Prank 1#
Names printed on the note: Arheddis Varkenjaab and Aywellbe Fayed
Reads like this: "I hate this fucking job, and I will be fired"
Listen to the audio below:

Prank 2#
Names printed on the note: Arhevbin Fayed and Bybeiev Rhibodie
Reads like this: "I‘ve just been fired, and bye-bye everybody"
Listen to the audio below:

Prank 3#
Names printed on the note: Aynayda Pizaqvick and Malexa Kriest
Reads like this: "I need a piss quick, and my legs are crossed"
Listen to the audio below:

Prank 4#
Names printed on the note: Awul Dasfilshabeda and Nowaynayda Zheet
Reads like this: "Oo-ah, that feels better and now I need a shit"
Listen to the audio below:

Prank 5#
Names printed on the note: Makollig Jezvahted and Levdaroum DeBahzted
Reads like this: "My colleague just farted, and left the room, the bastard"
Listen to the audio below:

Prank 6#
Names printed on the note: Steelaygot Maowenbach and Tuka Piziniztee
Reads like this: "Still, I got my own back and took a piss in his tea"
Listen to the audio below:

Amalan pelik pengikut Tok Pa

KUALA TERENGGANU: Seorang ketua ajaran pelik yang menjadi buruan kakitangan kerajaan kerana dikatakan memiliki ilmu bertaraf ‘karamah’ didakwa meminta pengikutnya hanya melihat bulu romanya meremang bagi menentukan waktu berbuka puasa.

Lelaki dikenali Tok Pa, berusia 50-an dan berstatus hartawan itu dikatakan aktif menjalankan kegiatan di sebuah kampung terpencil di daerah ini.

Dia yang mempunyai empat isteri, termasuk seorang daripadanya kakitangan kerajaan juga menggunakan ilmu hitam bagi membolehkan pengikutnya mematuhi permintaan dan arahan.

Tok Pa menjadikan umpan ilmu itu bagi menjerat pengikutnya.

Kegiatan lelaki itu didedahkan Pensyarah Fakulti Pengajian Islam, Universiti Darul Iman (UDM) di sini, Dr Abdul Manam Mohamad selepas didatangi bekas pengikut ajaran terbabit, baru-baru ini.

Menurut Dr Abdul Manam, bekas pengikut berusia 40-an itu menyertai kumpulan ajaran lelaki terbabit kira-kira lima tahun lalu dan meninggalkannya selepas mendapati ia bertentangan dengan Islam.

Katanya, bekas pengikut itu juga memberitahu ahli kumpulan terbabit hanya perlu berzikir seharian dan boleh meninggalkan solat fardu.

“Lebih pelik, bagi menentukan waktu berbuka puasa, pengikut hanya perlu melihat bulu romanya (Tok Pa) meremang sebelum boleh menjamah makanan.

“Amalan pelik itu disedari apabila mendapati penghuni di perkampungan itu sudah berbuka puasa lebih awal walaupun belum masuk waktu Maghrib.

“Malah, apabila ditanya, mereka mendakwa berbuka puasa selepas melihat bulu roma Tok Pa meremang,” katanya ketika ditemui Harian Metro, semalam.

Beliau berkata, bekas pengikut ajaran terbabit juga memberitahu, Tok Pa kini bertaraf hartawan dipercayai hasil sumbangan pengikutnya yang taksub.

Malah, dia juga memberitahu ada kalangan pengikut wanita yang dikatakan bercerai dengan suami semata-mata untuk berkahwin dengan Tok Pa.

“Selain itu, ada suri rumah yang sanggup menjual tanah sebelum wang itu dipercayai diserahkan kepada ketua ajaran terbabit.

“Saya difahamkan, Tok Pa memiliki wang dan harta yang banyak dan sudah membuka sebuah lagi perkampungan lain di Kelantan dipercayai bagi mengembangkan ajaran sesatnya itu,” katanya.

Kata Dr Abdul Manam, ketua ajaran sesat itu dipercayai mewujudkan perkampungan di kawasan pedalaman bagi mengelak kegiatannya dikesan pihak berkuasa selain memudahkannya melakukan kegiatan tidak bermoral.

Beliau tidak menolak kemungkinan ada pengikut yang sanggup menyerahkan anak gadis mereka untuk dipersembahkan kepada ketua ajaran terbabit.

“Saya juga yakin lelaki terbabit menggunakan ilmu hitam bagi menundukkan pengikutnya menyerahkan apa saja yang diminta.

“Memang pengikutnya akan berang jika didakwa seperti ini tetapi sebenarnya mereka tidak sedar ilmu sesat yang diamalkan,” katanya.

Berdasarkan pengakuan bekas pengikut ajaran terbabit, Dr Abdul Manam berpendapat Tok Pa dan pengikutnya tidak mahu melakukan ibadah syariat.

Menurutnya, kumpulan itu mungkin menganggap syariat itu hanya kulit semata-mata, manakala isinya adalah hakikat (haqoqah) dan makrifat yang disangka mereka sudah mencapai tahap hakikat dan makrifat itu.

“Mereka mungkin menyangka Tok Pa sudah sampai ke tahap tinggi dalam perkembangan kerohanian dan kerana itu, tidak perlu lagi bersusah-payah melakukan ibadah syariat.

“Bukan setakat itu, kumpulan terbabit juga memandang rendah kepada orang yang mengamalkan syariat itu.

“Bagi mereka, zikir semata-mata sudah mencukupi bagi menggantikan amal ibadah kerana tujuan melakukan amal ibadah itu untuk mengingati Allah.

“Mereka yang beranggapan seperti ini sebenarnya terkeliru dalam memahami beberapa dalil al-Quran dan hadis,” katanya.

Source: Harian Metro

Frightful by Quaintly (Su Ann)

A funny entry from Quaintly (Su Ann), she wrote:

Excerpts:

"i was lying down in this random salon in Bangsar, head tilted back and getting my eyebrows threaded. the lady doing my eyebrows had her hands all over my face, and normally that’s alright, but this one! this one! the horrid smell of her lunchtime chicken curry was unmistakable on her fingers, bits of her meal still stuck under her fingernails, as she played some kind of grotesque piano on my face - pressing here, tugging there, massaging rot into my face. she was oblivious to my gagging and choking, and i realized i’d not been this disgusted in a very long time. get your hands out of my face, i wanted to shriek; for gods sake, what beautician eats with their hands and then not wash them after lunch? when it was finally over, the longest 8 minutes of my life, i ran out of the salon and vomitted into a drain." Read further...

Magic Burger - Really cool trick

This got to be one of the coolest magic trick. Check it out!

I’ve nothing to hide, says Hishammuddin

KUALA LUMPUR: Declaring he has nothing to hide, Education Minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Hussein said claims on the misuse of funds by the Youth and Sports Ministry when he was the minister should be investigated thoroughly.

But he cautioned that any probe must be conducted fairly.

"It should be investigated. What’s wrong is wrong. Action has to be taken against wrongdoers, including me if I have done wrong," he said yesterday when commenting on the awarding of contracts worth RM450 million and doubtful purchases for the National Youth Skills Institute in 2002.

Hishammuddin was the Youth and Sports Minister from 1999 to 2004.

It was reported that the ministry’s secretary-general, only authorised to approve contracts which did not exceed RM5 million, was allowed to approve contracts worth RM449.42 million by the minister.
The Treasury, in its reply to the Auditor-General who highlighted various questionable expenditure by ministries and government departments in his 2006 audit report, stated that the youth and sports minister gave a letter of authority to the secretary-general to sign the contracts.

However, the Auditor-General said during the audit, "no such letter presented itself".

The Auditor-General also said the ministry paid RM8.39 million more than the market price for 13 items for the institute’s programmes.

Among these were RM224 for a set of four screwdrivers costing RM32 in the market; RM5.72 million for two crane towers against the market price of RM2.98 million; technical books consisting of 10 titles priced at RM10,700; and a 3.1 megapixel digital camera that was bought for RM8,254.

Speaking to the New Straits Times, Hishammuddin, in an obvious reference to Youth and Sports Minister Datuk Seri Azalina Othman Said’s statement on Monday that the contracts dated back to 2002 before she was appointed to the post, said: "On the allegations, my advice to them is no matter where we are, all are jointly responsible under the same government."

Azalina had said that the purchase of equipment for the institute was done through direct negotiations by the ministry two years before she was sworn in as the minister.

She said the contracts were awarded under the Eighth Malaysia Plan and was under the supervision of Project Management Consultants (PMC).

Azalina said she was told the ministry had given its justification on the issue, adding she did not really understand the contracts neither was she involved in them.

Source: The New Straits Times

Story 2:

PM wants answers: Abdullah orders ministries to explain to cabinet

KUCHING: Ministries implicated in the Auditor-General’s report for mismanaging funds and other irregularities must explain to the cabinet through their respective ministers, the prime minister said.

"The report has raised many questions and those involved must explain why such things happened.

"During the last cabinet meeting, before I left for the APEC (Asia-Pacific Economic Co-operation) meeting, I had directed all ministers to check matters pertaining to their respective ministries and report to the cabinet.

"Ministers must ensure that each matter raised in the Auditor-General’s report is studied and explained in detail," Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi said.

The prime minister was asked to comment on the report, which disclosed cases of wastage of public funds in several ministries and government agencies.
Abdullah, here to take part in the Malaysia Merdeka celebrations on Monday evening, was speaking at a press conference before departing for Singapore.

Several ministries have started probing departments and agencies under their purview, whose spending was highlighted in the report issued last Friday.

The Treasury had already responded to portions of the report, elaborating on the expenditures in some of the more glaring revelations.

On Monday, Second Finance Minister Tan Sri Nor Mohamed Yakcop said the units under the ministry had been directed to prepare an immediate accounting of the irregularities contained in the report.

In Putrajaya, Minister in the Prime Minister’s Department Datuk Seri Nazri Aziz said the Anti-Corruption Agency would question ministers if necessary over the Auditor-General’s Report 2006.

"The ACA can see anybody, whether minister or secretary-general.

"If they find that they need to meet the minister, it is within their right to do so. It is not necessary that all ministers must be interviewed, just those involved in the process," Nazri said after attending the ACA’s annual debate competition for secondary school students.

"If there is any abuse of power, any corrupt act in the report, then there is nothing to stop the ACA from taking action.

"The Auditor-General’s report is an official report. If the ACA can investigate anonymous letters, what more something reported officially.

"We must take the report seriously and take action as the same thing comes back every year. If it keeps coming back, something is really wrong."

Nazri said the ACA should be given time to study the report and conduct investigations.

He said while the Auditor-General had highlighted mistakes made by certain ministries and departments, these still had to be verified.

The Auditor-General’s report cannot be used as a basis for pressing charges until more information and clarification was obtained, he added.

ACA director-general Datuk Ahmad Said Hamdan said all ministries mentioned in the report would be looked into.

Source: The New Straits Times

Snatch thief a policeman

IPOH: When a group of men caught a snatch thief and handed him to the police, they were in for a shock — the thief was a policeman.

The man had snatched a handbag from a housewife at a coffee shop in Taman Ipoh Selatan. Her screams prompted some members of the public to give chase.

After catching him, they dragged him to the police station.

On checking his identification, the policemen there realised he was one of their own.

Perak police chief Datuk Zulkifli Abdullah confirmed that the suspect was a policeman but declined comment, adding that police would investigate.

Source: The New Straits Times

Setarbak Kopi or Starbucks?

Name sounds familiar...

I guess StarBucks may have ripped off...Setarbak Kopi. Shame on you Starbucks, shame on you!

Massage for bigger manhood ‘dangerous’

KOTA BARU: Fisherman Wan Mat (not his real name) is worried stiff.

The 54-year-old from Bachok, who recently underwent a traditional massage for penile enlargement, is finding out that one should not believe all that is advertised on the matter.

"The masseur told me that by enlarging my penis, I could rejuvenate my sex life. But the thing is, nothing has changed since then. I don’t even feel a tingle.

"I am worried that I might not be able to perform in bed any more," he said.

The father of four said he had thought that the treatment would help the erectile dysfunction he had been suffering for two months.
"I have been avoiding sex with my wife. I thought that by enlarging my penis I could solve my woes," he said.

Wan Mat is among many in Kelantan who seek the help of traditional masseurs to improve their sexual health instead of going to doctors.

They are wooed by advertisements placed on trees lining roads that promise to increase the girth and length of the penis for conjugal bliss.

Universiti Sains Malaysia Hospital Family Health Clinic specialist, Professor Dr Shaiful Bahari Ismail said massage of the penis and testicles might prove dangerous for people suffering from erectile dysfuncton.

He said the only proven method of treating the problem was through modern methods, including medicines, surgery and vacuum pumps.

"There is a perception that massage can help improve sexual performance. However, it is believed to be either dangerous, ineffective, or both.

"Although there is no scientific research on the effect of massage of the private parts, massaging techniques carried out directly on the penis and testicles may damage blood vessels, the nerve system and even the skin," he said.

Dr Shaiful said many had visited his clinic complaining of ineffective traditional treatment of the problem.

He said most suffering from the problem were above 50 and usually diabetic, suffering from heart disease or high blood pressure.

"They only seek modern treatment after noticing that the traditional treatment, which they underwent to cure impotency, was ineffective. After diagnosing their problem, we treat them with medicines," he said.

Traditional masseur Mohd Zafri Harun, 35, who has been in the business for 15 years, claimed a success rate of 70 per cent.

He even claimed that vacuum pumps were hazardous "as they could cause cancer".

"So far, most of my clients are satisfied with my service. They are happy with the size achieved after treatment," he said, adding that he had learned the techniques from his father. And it doesn’t come cheap either.

Zafri said a "standard package" was priced at between RM200 and RM300.

Sourcce: The New Straits Times

If Vietnamese Speak Hokkien by Kenny Sia

Kenny Sia wrote:

Excerpts:

"We are on our second last day in Vietnam.
...
Not far away from where we stay, I saw this guesthouse with a pretty bizzare name.

My Cock Guesthouse!" Read further...

Paying through the nose for tools

PETALING JAYA: Would you pay RM224 for a set of four screwdrivers?

Probably not, but that was what the Government paid to supply tools for students at the eight National Youth Skills Institutes (IKBN) around the country, according to the Auditor-General’s (AG) report.

The AG said the screwdrivers had a market price of RM40 and according to pictures in the report, resembled the average Philips screwdrivers you could buy in any hardware shop.

And it does not stop there – the AG went a step further by examining the prices paid for 12 other tools and equipment bought for the IKBN project, comparing it with market prices when the procurement was done in late 2002.

Among these were technical books consisting 10 titles that had a price tag of RM10,700 and a 3.1 megapixel digital camera that was bought for RM8,254.

For the 13 items that the report highlighted, the Government paid RM8.39mil more than the market price at that time.

According to the report, consultants for the Youth and Sports Ministry had reached an estimated price tag of RM399.67mil for the equipment for the IKBN project which later ballooned to RM767.98mil after two appeals by the ministry for additional allocations.

“The ministry said more money was needed in anticipation of a bigger student population and that getting equipment from the same supplier meant prices would remain the same.

“But there was no proof that market research was done to identify the prices of the items and equipment because minutes for the negotiation meetings were not prepared,” the report said.

It said without the minutes, the auditing team was unable to find out if efforts were made to reduce prices.

The AG also said that the ministry’s secretary-general (KSU) had signed off 11 contracts worth between RM7.99mil and RM74.2mil that were related to the IKBN project, on behalf of the Government.

“The KSU only has the authority to sign contracts worth less than RM5mil. Anything larger should be signed by the minister or someone to whom the authority has been given.

“However, during the audit, no such letter giving the authority to the KSU presented itself,” the report said.

The report said there were also discrepancies such as one supplier being paid more than the other for exactly the same equipment.

One example the AG highlighted showed one supplier getting RM1.24mil more than the other for identical engineering equipment.

Source: The Star Online

FM: It's so obvious...do we really need to SPELL out what's happening here... just fill in the blank C_RR _PT_ _ N
Congrates to the A-G for their thorough investigation.

President Bush - the smartest USA President to date

A plane is about to crash. There are 5 passengers on board, but there are only 4 parachutes….

The first passenger says:

"I am Ronaldo, the best football player in the world. The football world needs me, and I cannot die on my fans." He grabs the first parachute and jumps out of the plane ".

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says:

“I am the wife of the former president of the United States; I am the senator of New York and I have a good chance of being president of the United States in the future.“ She grabs a parachute and jumps off the plane.

The third passenger, George W. Bush, says:

“I am the president of the United States of America. I have huge responsibilities in the world. Besides, I am the smartest president in the history of my country and can‘t shun the responsibility to my people by dying.“ He grabs a pack and jumps off the plane.

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a young school boy:

"I am old. I have lived my life as a good person as a priest should and so I shall leave the last parachute to you; you have the rest of your life ahead of you."

To this the little boy says:

“Don‘t fret old man...There is a parachute for each of us! The smartest president of America took my schoolbag….."

Do you want some more proof to believe that he is the smartest president of america… then see the following photos …